ultimate-insider

Blog Action Day

2007-10-14T01:09:00.000-07:00

Keep in mind that Blog Action Day is less then 2 days away but you can still sign up here. Basically on October 15th, 13785 bloggers (and counting) will be posting something about the environment in an effort to build awareness on global environment issues. Some of the blogs; Official Google Blog, Youtube Blog, Opera, Lifehacker, with thousands of others!So go check it out!

Today is Blog Action Day

2007-10-14T00:34:00.000-07:00

Ok I did not expect to be out so late but complications arose and I find myself posting on the tale end of this day. But at least I'm doing it.

Today I'm going to be talking about Canada, yes it is the country north of the US, it is also the country north (but in a southern kind of way) of Russia. Yes it is Canada, it is northern Canada specifically that I wish to speak about.

Last year Northern Canada received record snow falls, this past summer several small northern towns experienced massive flooding from all the snow.

*While global warming deniers may see more snow a victory you have to remember this is northern Canada where in the winter tempters can drop to -50 F.

It is essential to understand that snow can only be made at a certain temperature, somewhere around 32 to 27 F. ** These figures indicate that it is impossible for it to snow at tempters even close to -50F.

The past year's record snow fall means what? Areas where it is usually far to cold for massive snowfall, have been experiencing none other then massive snowfall! This means temperatures are rising!

I know it may sound contradictory; more snow gives global warming more credibility, but ask any meteorologist, they'll tell you- it can only snow under very specific conditions. In some parts of the word these conditions have been occurring for years in others only now are we seeing tempters high enough to allow for any snow fall.

I'd give you a list of what you can do to help, but most people already know the basics and it'd sound hypocritical and condescending going through a list that I myself only loosely fallow. It's all about starting small, it has to be consumers who make a change, companies only sell what people buy. The problem is that most people don't know or don't care.

Blog Action Day, October 15th 2007, over 15,000 blogs posting something about our home.

*http://www.cbc.ca/canada/north/story/2007/04/09/whitehorse-snow.html

**I got this from a number of online sources including http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snow and http://www.snowmakers.cz/Home%20EN/EN%20Snomax.HTM

Awww Bunnies

2007-10-11T19:23:00.000-07:00

Sony has just released another stunning and amazing add for there "Bravia" television. This one features some cute bunnies! Here.

These amazing adds are created by the Fallon marketing agency are some of the most stunning I have ever seen, these bunnies are the third installment of this amazing ad campaign and I hope they have a few more in the pipe line. (the official site has the adds and some behind the scenes stuff but it's super slow Paint and Bouncie Balls).

The thing about these adds that really blows me away-the released a teaser for the latest before it came out! That's right there so popular that they advertise the advertisement! yeah a teaser!
More news on my site I am really thinking about making it look nicer but for those of you who know me well I can not do CSS-which is what it would take... Soooo we'll see.

Radio-Updates

2007-10-10T22:24:00.000-07:00

So Radiohead's new album "In Rainbows" is pretty good, I'm not a big Radiohead listener but I'm told it's a bit softer then some of there others but it's good 'Nude' is great 'Weird Fish/Arpeggios' is sweet. So go on and get some!

In Rainbows

2007-10-08T22:41:00.000-07:00

In case you have not heard Raidohead is releasing a new album called "In Rainbows", it's not necessarily the music that's revolutionary but the way in which they plan on selling this puppy. Radiohead does not have a big label backing this album in fact they don't have one at all, no they have decided to go the way of the Artic Monkeys, no label. However it's not this labelless fad that people won't shut up about. It's the fact that on October 10th the whole album will be available for download for however much you want to pay! To be more clear say you don't want to pay for the privilege of hearing In Rainbows, you don't have to! Say you want to pay 80 pounds (the site is in pounds but for those of you who are not up on world finance that's about 162 US bucks), you can. That's the genius not only is Radiohead getting endless amounts of publicity they are also letting costumers download the whole thing for free, if they wanted. This is where human nature comes in, take the average man lets say Travis Fantina well he hates spending money however knowing that he does not have to pay for something will make him more inclined to pay for it. See when people extend you an offer of good will you are more likely to repay them.

I have no plans of spending anything close to what I would for a normal CD however I plan on giving two or three pounds. While there are some who will exploit this system, this is of corse there right as Radiohead is allowing free downloading, I feel that many will take my own point of view and put a few coins in the cup.

There is no doubt that Radiohead will make money not only from people like me paying a little for our downloads but also for die hard fans Radiohead is also a Diskbox set which includes a CD (with some bonus songs) 2 vinyl records, some digital photos and artwork along with some other neat tidbits.

More from Radiohead's site In Rainbows

PS I have plans of making yet another set of changes to my awesome site soon!

OSX 10.5

2007-10-03T19:42:00.000-07:00

Well it's October, and most somewhat credible blogs are saying that Apple will be releasing there latest OSX "Leopard" this month. Quite exciting news for us Apple fans, however I have no real plans of upgrading until I buy a new computer (sometime in the spring I hope). I really have nothing to say other then I am utra-excited (like more excited then I was when Tiger came out) and I hope to review this amazing OS within a few weeks of it's release (If I can get my hands on a computer running it).

Semi recent pics from "Think Secret"

Hey

2007-09-22T22:44:00.000-07:00

Just checking in no big news. My film was supposed to play at a show tonight but did not because of technical difficulties. Lame man.

Please be informed

2007-09-10T17:49:00.000-07:00

This blog is basically a back up for what I post on my new blog @ my website www.nufichicken.com (personal site) however if you hate my site and love blogger please keep coming here.

How to Survive a Mafia Hit

2007-09-08T23:22:00.000-07:00

Some people write self help books to get rich, I’m not in it for the money and I don’t have the energy to write a book but I did wright this little blurb of lies because I was board. - Please keep in mind I am not an actual expert, in a real life situation these are most likely things that no thinking human being would do.

If you are reading this you are a very lucky person indeed, maybe you were tipped off or possibly you were even lucky enough to survive an attack. However what is in the past is not important what really matters is that if the Mafia missed once they will not miss again. So as an expert on all matters, I have written this handy set of instructions on how to avoid being killed or tortured by the Mafia.

1) Hide. Trust me if you can hide from the Mafia it is definitely the best way to go I recommend moving to a secret house deep in a California desert. Unless you have instructions from- er Mr. Smith against hiding, it is definitely the way to go.

2) Curl up into a ball, while effective this method is only to be executed with great skill.What not to do; when the hit man sits on the bar stool next to you, you drop down and curl up into a ball protecting you’re neck and other valuable organs. The proper way; if you know that the hit man is coming in the next few hours, use a razor blade to make a small incision in the back of you’re sofa or Lazy Boy®, curl up inside the particular furnishing then have a friend push it back against the wall. Please note: If this is what you are planning it may be wise to bring food and water.

3) Pretend to be Hermit the Frog, (only for amphibian creatures) according to film and television lure a certain famous show business frog once had an older brother who lived a secret live of crime while being a shame they still loved him. Tragically, Hermit’s dangerous, yet low profile life of crime was, eventually ended by officer Joe Burnett (the man who killed Edward Capehard O’Kelly, the man who had killed Robert Ford who was famous for killing Jessie James). This saddened the Frog family and eventually Kermit (hearing about the older brother he never knew) decided to do something, something that would both keep his brother in their hearts while bettering the world. He took his dead brother’s name and created a series of fake IDs and papers which he gave to those who had been wrongfully accused of crimes with there new names these frogs were able to get across the border to and away from the government. You too can do this with a little bit of know how, it’s definitely challenging but if it means living without fear then it’s worth it.

4)Those are three things you can do now for some things, which you should only do if you want to die.
Go to prison: lots of people think this will get them out of harms way, it won’t. Most mafia establishments have more then one on the inside and you will end up dead anyway.

Curl up into a ball (see step number 2 for proper technique)Go ‘Rambo’ on them: this does not work.

Cry: You are the end of you’re rope there is nothing else you can do, it’s probably better to go quietly then go out kicking and screaming.

News

2007-09-07T23:22:00.001-07:00

Well I hated the blog’s old look as much as anybody not that this look really fits with the design of my site however it still looks better then the old one and lets face it I will never have the guts to go through all the CSS and fix it to look more like my site. So this is how it stays.Other news, I am working on a cheesy new film coming soon, some of my YouTube stalkers may have already seen most of it.

Blog

2007-08-27T23:17:00.000-07:00

Ok so I have been having some trouble with the blog lately, I was working with the old theme when it when crazy and fell apart so I had to switch over to this theme sorry I know the blue links on green are not great but I’ll try to get that better soon.

Ugly Website?

2007-08-27T23:16:00.000-07:00

Several designers have told me that my website is ugly, I really don’t care, if you like it then fine if not then fine I like it so I really don’t care. Yes I know neon green is not the best color for websites and the layout is very plain but I tried several different ways and besides I make movies not websites. Maybe someday I’ll switch it up however for now it may make you’re eyes bleed.

Blog Action Day!

2007-08-18T23:14:00.000-07:00

I recently signed up for one of the coolest things ever! Blog Action Day, basically on October 15th bloggers will post something about the environment, what we've done to it what we can do to help anything along those lines. If you're a blogger I definitely encourage you to go check it out!

Earthquake ?!?

2007-08-18T18:39:00.002-07:00

We had a bit of an earthquake! That's what I thought when I woke up actually all that really happened is we found out what happens when you leave the sprinkler on all night.

Odd Thing

2007-08-18T18:39:00.001-07:00

Recently we were digging around in my grandparents basement when an odd discovery was made a 20-something year old post card to "Babs and Pete". The writing on the back was long and detailed, this is not the best part however, the post card details events that happened to an individual over the corse of a few days that were so fantastic it's hard to believe. It does nothing in the retelling so without further a due I give you the mystery post card!This leads me to believe that the person writing this either led a fascinating life or was just completely crazy and on the verge of a break down. Either way it's really very fascinating, now the important part if you wrote this or received this or had anything to do with this please contact me tfantina@gmail.com really that would be awesome.

Elephants and a blog.

2007-08-18T18:37:00.000-07:00

We had some old boxes lying around so I took a paper towel and became an elephant, so now I'm already for Halloween. Originally I was planning on gaining weight and going as a hippo but after being warned by several doctors I decided that this ears and trunk elephant costume was way better.

. Also on a less serious not I know this blog looks like crap, I know I will be making it look awesome very soon.

Should probably publish this

2007-07-18T20:27:00.000-07:00

I have been taking a bit of a break, and working on my website nufihicken.com I may integrate this blog over to nufichicken.com. But that's still not a good excuse. I'm sorry.

Travel fun!

2007-06-19T18:19:00.000-07:00

If all had gone to plan I would have been in the Yukon Territory in about 4 hours, however once again the forces of nature and airlines have teamed up against me to make me miss my flight! Horror of horrors Toronto was plauged with thunder storms so I'm still in New Jersey thinking; I really have not posted in a long time.
Anyway this story further illustrates that the King of Air travel hates me, for those you who have not kept count let me catch you up on all my bad airline experances;

Luggage lost*: Twice
Flights Missed: One
Flights Canceled: Twojavascript:void(0)
Stuck in Edmonton for two days: Once
Gross Meal's: A coupple.

Now I'm not complaining I have never been strip searched or had my 3rd world country break into civil war and be forced to live in the airport, no such luck but I feel I have been inconvenienced more then the average air travler.

*Lost meaning, lost but later found both times.

First Swim

2007-05-28T09:31:00.000-07:00

I went for my first swim of the season the other day, that was not the best of ideas. I had that song "Temperature" stuck in my head, which was not appropriate for event- it was freezing! By the third lap I could not breath but I had set a goal of ten, so I had to be stupid and actually finish it. As the 8th lap loomed I asked myself "Why do people think this is fun?" no answers came to mind but the odd part is that I'll probably be in again today.
You may be wondering why it's this cold; this late in may there are several reasons;
1) It’s an in-ground pool this is not a bad thing but when combined with the rest of the list it's quite a problem.
2) It’s filled with frigid well water.
3) Due to his tree friends Mr. Pool only gets about 5 minuets of sun light a day.
4) It’s old: I think it was built before they invented heat so they did not know how to handle it.
As you can tell it was a great way for Houdini to practice jumping into frigid ponds

My May

2007-05-11T18:22:00.000-07:00

Well May has been good to me so far, unfortunately I was not able to eat Mexican food on Cinco De Mayo! Fortunately I was able to catch the new Spiderman film which was quite nice. Later in the week I ate slept and trained to become a ninja. That's all for now.

Cinco De Mayo

2007-05-04T21:41:00.000-07:00

Happy Cinco De Mayo everybody! I know it's been a while I have been busy doing nothing, but now I'm back and shure to be updateing lots; trust me it's my Cinco De Mayo resolution, which reminds me I'm really craveing "Jarritos" soda.
Anyway this is my first time celebrating Cinco De Mayo, and I want to make shure I'm not doing anything wrong. Basically I'm planning on eating lots of food (at least one of my meals will be 100% Mexican I hope), and celabrateing by going to a movie. I was thinking of getting a piñata but I'm not shure if I want to go through the hasstle of cleaning up "Bazooka Joe" and his buddies.
Well that's all for now I'll tell you how my celabration goes tomarow- also look for a review of "Spider Man 3"!

DVD Bonus

2007-04-14T13:03:00.000-07:00

I recently received National Treasure on DVD, if you have not yet seen it I recommend it, anyway I noticed that shrink wrapped in with the DVD was a pumpkin seed. Yes a pumpkin seed was shrink wrapped with my DVD! I was a little disapointed to find that it was only a shell (I was hungrey), but I enjoyed the movie.

It's electric!

2007-04-11T16:58:00.001-07:00

I consider myself to be a very electric person inside and out, this however, is quite a problem in the spring and fall and it is the reasion why I am dirty today. Every spring and fall I get electrocuted by static an astronomical about of times, and up untill yesterday I only had problems around metal objects. But it was yeasterday when I was shocked by the soap, yes a bar of hand soap! IT HAS HAPPENED TWICE!!! Needless to say I'm scared to wash my hands and when I do I gingerly touch the soap. I was wondering if anybody else has had this problem and if any smart people read my blog what is the cause of this?

Hoppy Easter

2007-04-10T18:53:00.000-07:00

For the first time in a long time I was without internet for about 4 days!!! So I am deeply sorry I was not here to wish you a Happy Easter, but the good news is that we did have use of a TV so I got to wach the good ole' Yankees playing in frigid weather. So on behalf of myself, my blog and somebody else I would like to wish you, in the words of the Easter Bunny, 'A Hoppy Easter!'

Tax Time

2007-04-05T14:25:00.000-07:00

Well it's April 5th which means everybody simultaneously turns from talking about the weather, famous people, there neighbors and Lost, to Taxes. Everybody's got something to say about Taxes and most of the time they have more then one thing to say, this can be a problem when it comes to long car trips around this time of year. Even people who don't actually do there taxes have something to say; "you shuld have seen that line at H&R Block!"
Remember that there are several ways to pay less then you actually owe, some people would go so far as to say this is illigal however as the old saying goes; it's only illigal if you think prision is a bad thing. (Personally I recomend paying your taxes in full and take no responsabilaty if you do not.)
Well thanks for reading my Tips on how to go to Prision, Vol 1. Next week steeling a car in front of a police officer.

I'm baaaack!

2007-03-26T19:23:00.000-07:00

Just got the internet working here in New Jersey so I am back! By the way I will be in New Jersey untill June then back to the Great White North to be with the folks!

Tales from the Road

2007-03-21T05:11:00.001-07:00

My day has been filled with the smiling faces, cleanliness and joy that travel always brings! I am writing this in San Francisco airport, which is not my final destination-in fact I had not even planned on coming here until I missed my flight in Vancouver! I got off the plane and wandered aimlessly looking for my luggage do you go through customs first? Or pick up your bags first? When going through customs do you have to declare the roast beef you ate for lunch? These are questions you too may have asked yourself at one point in time. Anyway I was lucky enough to get flights to San Francisco then on to Newark at basically the same times. It was the quick and savvy work of a Untied check in guy that saved me from a fate that surely would have ended up like that movie ‘The Terminal’. Well that’s all for now I will write again at 6:30 am when I get to Newark. (I’m to cheep to use the airports Wi-Fi so I’m just going to pretend I’m posting this now).
Hi again its 8:00 am I just got here after a very long flight. I consider myself and other people consider me to be quite the movie buff, however out of all the films I see in a year only about 4 or 5 are seen at the theater the rest are rented so what a quincedence it was that Stranger then Fiction would be playing on my flight yes one of the 3 films I saw in theaters last year! I would not complain except this seems to happen every time there is an in-flight movie! I swear the airline executives just fallow me around-“Get the lawyers on the phone! Travis just went in the theater start making a deal for Stranger then Fiction!”
Despite all my complaints flying was, really a fine experience security was smooth customs was a breeze and there was very little turbulence. I’d rate it 7 out of 10.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

2007-03-20T09:38:00.000-07:00

Today I leave for New Jersey I will be there until June. For those of you who don't know what this is; New Jersey is the 3rd oldest state (according to Wikipedia), it is the birthplace of Steven Spielberg and several other people who you may have heard of. The first and only perfect little leuge game was pitched there (Not a single hit!), it is home to some great beaches and other things! So greetings from future me in New Jersey! (PS tomorrow I will post how the air travle went).

New Styles

2007-03-19T09:06:00.000-07:00

Sorry I was rather busy-these past 2 or 3 weeks but I did have time to do some spring cleaning on my blog. I gave it a sweet new style! More posts and um posts to come soon!

Experiment

2007-03-07T10:00:00.000-08:00

Here are the results of my little experiment (see below post); so far I have recived no alerts from Google this leads me to believe that Google has no clue about the existence of this blog-Ironic because I use Blogger which is owned by Google. Oh well looks like-for now-I will go unnoticed.

Google Alerts

2007-03-05T23:42:00.000-08:00

I was reading Scott Adams blog which by the way terrific. Anyway he was talking about technology that he thought was too fricken cool-an example of this type of technology given was Google Alerts. Here's what he had to say about it;
"...Google Alerts. It sends me an e-mail any time my keywords newly appear on the Internet. My keywords are “Scott Adams Dilbert.” Now, I usually have my Blackberry 8700 in my pocket. So check this out…

Any time that 11-year old Vijay sits at his Dad’s computer in Lucknow, India, and blogs about his favorite Dilbert comic, Google finds it, and sends that link directly to my left front pocket. I reach in, pull out the Blackberry, click the link, and Vijay’s blog opens. I read it, just to see what little Vijay thinks of me today...."

I decided to do a little test and see if Google alerts could find my humble blog. So I just signed up with Google Alerts and added Scott Adams to my list of key words, now I'm not 11, or living in India however I am blogging about Scott Adams, so I am hoping that some time in the near future I will get an email telling me that somebody just made a blog entry about Mr. Adam's that would make my day. I will return tomorrow with the results of my experment.

List of Members

2007-03-01T23:40:00.000-08:00

I thought I'd make a list of the things I belong to so you can track me down when you're there! This is also my way of saying yes I have been gone for a loong time.

Nationstates; http://www.nationstates.net/travisthegreat
Digg; http://digg.com/users/bobchicken/profile
Colourlovers; http://www.colourlovers.com/lover/traviscool
Deviantart; http://traviscool.deviantart.com/

When I think of more I will call you.

Personal blog

2007-01-30T11:37:00.000-08:00

Latley I have been thinking alot about moveing this (my personal blog) to a site which I still have yet to build. Yet I'm not shure I have the courage to move all of my 60+ posts over with me. It's a tough desiccation so I was wondering if you all could make it with me. Leave a comment, should I move this to a personal website or stay with blogger?

I am not Nerdy Pickle

2007-01-06T15:20:00.001-08:00

Just to let you Nerdy Pickle and Ultimate-Insider- are not the same, we simpley use the same blogger account!

Corners

2007-01-04T16:52:00.000-08:00

Have you ever noticed when you walk around a corner and bump into somebody, it's always there falt? "They should slow down!" or "Don't they know that it's dangerous to get to close to a corner?" I think these things several times a day, I have contemplated listening to myself and asking myself those same questions, but I am always hoping society is getting smarter and not walking so fast and tightly around corners beacouse I need that space for brisk walking and hugging the wall.

5 Things you did not know about me

2007-01-01T23:31:00.000-08:00

This meme was past to me by Jeff Wheeler
Here we go,
1) I used to play David and Goliath with a ball of socks.
2) Although I frequently use Flash even though I know almost no Action Script.
3) I used to be afraid of citys.
4) I find the word "pickles" can be used for almost anything.
5) I collect most of my correspondence in a folder.

I pass this on to U@ and Anna

Travle time

2006-11-30T23:10:00.000-08:00

In case anybody was wondering where I was; I was away. As you can imagine somebody such as myself does lots of traveling; so much that I know what has to come out of the bag and into the little trays, and what can stay in. Laptop, camera=separate bins but change, phone, jacket, iPod are all safe to ride together in the same bin.
I'm shure by now you are all awe struck by my knowledge of travel. However, no matter how far or how long I fly there is always that feeling the night before that as you step through the metle detectors the red light will flash and you will be tackled by seven burley TSA agents, strip searched then disapear with out a trace like George Orwell's '1984'.
I highly dobut this will ever happen, but it's still something I don't like to think about.

Happy Year!

2006-11-01T19:36:00.000-08:00

Happy year everybody! I have been doing this for one year today, and what do you know I'm sick! Thanks for reading for a whole year and please stay reading for at least another!

Words of the Wise (Oct 21); Food woes

2006-10-21T10:31:00.000-07:00

I opened up the refrigerator this morning and found-to my horror-lots of food! Now I know what you're thinking, "that's good". The only reason you're thinking that is because you have been brain washed by the masses that haveing a full fridge is good. But actaully have ing a full fridge is a very bad thing, face it you and I both know that you'll never eat that meat loaf that's been sitting in the back on top of the Chinese take out sense June. I have that problem too, it's almost as if you become sentimentally attached to food and are no longer able to throw it out. This happens so much that you no longer have room in the fridge for real food that any human would eat. So what do you do? Buy another fridge and put it in the basement; you call it "Food storage" (but really what's the point of storeing parshable food for a disaster? The minuet that meator strikes you will be eating Eggos like no tomorrow!) everybody knows you just bought the second fridge beacuse you were to afraid to throw anything out.
I think I can help us all before our houses are completly filled with refrigerators; Reduce Reuse Recycle! We will be doing the reuse part-come along it's fun!
There are tons of food items in your fridge that have more then one use for instance frozen pancakes-they may not be eatable anymore but they make great coasters! No need to spend lots of money on expensive art, decorate you house with that old casserole! Hang it on your wall (If you can put a nail through it). Rice from take out boxes that's gotten all hard-it makes excellent cat litter!
It's really quite easy to get rid of food with out actually getting rid of it, all it takes is some nails (to hang the casserole), an actave imagination-for food products that I did not mention above, and lots of Glade plugins!

Keyboard woes

2006-10-20T14:21:00.000-07:00

I know it's been over two weeks, but the good news is that I fixed the position of my keyboard so it no longer feels like I'm throwing cinder blocks at my wrists when I'm writhing. Actually I fixed my keyboard about a mounth ago, but it makes for a good excuse. Any whosit I'm back.

Words of the Wise (Sept 29):Somebody do something news worthy!

2006-09-30T09:33:00.000-07:00

I hope something really big, huge, happens this weekend, nothing bad (I'm cynical not evil), just something big. The reasion I am wishing for this; I am getting tired of there being no news. Each day I wake up and ooh, looks like the first female space tourist just broke the atmosphere! Guess what the astronauts rebuilding the international space station had to come back beacouse they forgot there hammer! The first female space tourist, saw a moon fly by on the left of the ship (or maybe it was just some space junk). The first female space tourist opened up a raspberry tart space pack, but it was actually one of the ice cream ones! And did I tell you there was a lady space tourist in space!
Ok, we get it there's no news, now you space buffs are saying "Travis, this is the best month of our lives", I am aware of this, but can we keep it off the front page, space stories are generally reserrved for 25a, I'm a computer buff, but you don't see me spreading lap-top stories all over the New York Times.
When there is no news, tabloids make there money;

"Wow hunny, there was a dancing monkey on Lettermen last night."

The young coupple reads the headline then turns to the tabloid section;

"Oh wow, a five headed man from Mars just caught Osama!"

Wich would you buy? Really every time there is no news big news companies must shoot them selves in the feet. It's not absolutly nessacary to make up a headline but if the only news was about that dancing monkey, what would you do?

Twinkies

2006-09-29T20:06:00.000-07:00

I heard today that Twinkies have a half-life of twelve years, this is disturbing, now don't get me wrong I love the Twinkie (although I prefer the Devil Dog) there great, but nobody wants to here the words Twinkie and half-life in the same phrase. It's not natural, wich is what most of the food we consume is-not natural. I would much rather wach TV and stuff my face with Twinkies then read about the Twinkie half-life while stuffing my face with Twinkies. The same goes with potato chips, french fries, chocolate (however recent studies show that chocolate can be good for the heart and taste buds), soda, and various other forms of junk. So if you're pushing healthy eating please push somewhere else beacouse I'm stuffing my face with a Philly chease steak!

(Authors note: I have no actuall clue what the Twinkie half-life is, Wikipedia says the 12 year thing is a myth, so go on stuff your face it's ok there really healthy and only have a shelf life of 25 days.)

It took me 2 hours to write this!

2006-09-15T18:11:00.000-07:00

So it's been almost a week sence I lasted posted anything, so I thought I should today... ...I probably should have created some kind of agenda but... Well I just ate dinner, had dersert, went out for an hour and forgot I was working on a blog entry, now I am no longer motavated.

Words of the Wise (Sept 9): Funny

2006-09-09T17:40:00.000-07:00

For some reasion I find almost everything funny, you can and will interpret this in one of two ways, one: I find joy in life and a jolly humorous person. Two; a cynical and bitter shell of a man. Chances are you picked neither because just when you were about to decide this sentence started and insed of stopping and thinking about the two choices you were offered you just carelessly read on. However when you got to the end of that sentence you stopped and thought about what you just read, maybe you even chuckled a little bit. For some reasion I find this funny.

Getting back to my original point if you guessed point number two you were right, or at least for the most part. I consider myself a jolly cynic: meaning I can laugh at anything. This is good and bad at the same time, beacouse this morning I got up and drove a few hours to go to the grocery store, now I could have gone to the grocrey store accross the street but it's a ugly shade of gray thus I hate it. I find it funny how I dive an hour to get to my preferred store beacouse I hate the color of my local one, haha haha the jolly cynic strikes again! When I got to the store I started laughing at this big guy beacouse well he was a body builder and for some reasion I find them funny. Then I got mauled wich was also funny, it's just so stereotypical of big tuff guys to also be mean.

What has really been annoying me of late is words, I find them like everything else funny. This is bad beacouse I can no longer carry on conversations with people;

Me: So I here you have cats (chuckle)

Guy: Yes, I have two cats, my cats like to sit on the window sill, however my one cat fell off now the other cat has the sill all to it's self.

Me: (Burst out laughing)

Because think about it if you really focus on a word for a long time it automatically becomes funny. Funny, now there's a funny word funny is just so funny, haha I can't stop laughing funny, it's funny, just so funny!

Words of the Wise (Sept 2); Shot in the foot.

2006-09-02T18:26:00.000-07:00

I just shot my self in the foot, well not literally. What happened was I bought a new keyboard, before it had always been just me and my laptop but I read on the internet that if a laptop keyboard breaks, you can not replace it, this is bad. So I got a new one for home use. But now it does not fit on my desk, so I just opened my desk drawer and put it in there, wich was bad because now my carpal tunnel is acting up and I can't write anything.

Comments from the road II

2006-08-09T04:53:00.000-07:00

Hello everybody still on the road, literally I am naked in the middle of the road and here's how it happened; I had decided to hit up a baseball game while in the try state area but after I had bought tickets I realized that oh no, I don't have a car! So I started walking it was a long walk and after I had gone 3 minuets I started hitchhiking, which was a bad idea. So I hitched a ride with a trucker but there were two problems with this; 1 he was going in the wrong direction and 2 he was a sadistic killer.
So there I was stuck to his seat (he covered it with Krazy Glue) he was revving up his chain saw and nobody was watching the road. I did what anybody would have done if they were me, took off all my cloths (because they were stuck to the glue which was stuck to the seat) opened the door and jumped to the grass right before the truck careened off a cliff and the Duel music started playing.
I pulled myself from the grassy roadside and began to hitch hike again but this time I was only in my under where. After a few minuets a cop picked me up and said he could take me to the baseball game. I rode with him for a few minuets before he got a message that a high-speed chase was going on in the area, so of course he had to join! We picked up the guys trail and fallowed for a long time. It was nothing but high speed TV style action the whole time! Then daister struck we hit a wet spot going around a turn and smashed into a parked car, my seat belt broke and I went right through the windshield! I was lucky because I was wearing a hat and this protected my head. Anyway the windshield did not stop me I rocketed through the air gaining speed I hardly knew what was happening before my head struck the wing of a low flying air plane (1 to 2 thousand feet) and I bounced back to earth landing on the pavement right out side the ball park!
Well I need to get some pants and a shirt before the game starts so good day everybody!

Comments from the road

2006-07-26T08:12:00.000-07:00

Olah, (that's French for Hello I am traveling). So anyway I have been on the road for about two weeks now and everything has been going great! So far I have not been imprisoned for not removing my belt at airport security, knock wood. Well I am currently staying in America's #2 vacation spot New Jersey (second only to Florida), ha no I love New Jeresy from our syringe filled beaches to the gang warfare in Trenton, from the smog in Newark to the rattle of change at Trhump Tashma Hall! (I don't know how to spell it but you know what I mean). New Jersey is actually my second home (being the insider that I am I have homes all over the world). Well thanks for reading and enjoy the memories I will try to write again some time soon (if not I died at the beach)!

Me

2006-07-12T14:11:00.000-07:00

I am a columnist meaning I always were a jacket around the house and I always look nice and sometimes I smoke a pipe;

That at least seems to be the stereotype of all columnists weather they be, political (funny), humorous (funny), technology (intresting) or self-help (funny). I decided I was going to break this stereotype by taking a picture of myself dressed in pajamas and a button down plaid shirt with a mayonnaise stain (ewww) but then I realized two things; one I don't own a button down plaid shirt with a mayonnaise stain (ewww) and two I would rather play dress up.

Public Service Announcement

2006-07-10T18:47:00.000-07:00

I have been going on lots of trips recently; for instance this past weekend I went for a very relaxing over night (hence the reason I did not post) and I am going on a very nice long trip this coming week it's a big one. Be warned that while I am away I will not post much maybe about 2 or 3 times. Thanks for listing!

What I did today

2006-07-05T21:30:00.000-07:00

It would be stupid to write about this because 97% of what I did today was think of what I was going to write in my blog... If I did write about that it would go like this; I woke up and thought, "what on Earth can I write today?" Then I had lunch and I was like "I could write about-no wait that would be lame".

So as you can tell once again I have a 100% genuine blog entry out of having nothing to write about! I think I am obsessed with the idea that you can fill a book with writing about not knowing what to write, thank you and good night!

Words of the Wise (July 1);Happy July

2006-07-03T22:40:00.000-07:00

Sorry I'm late I missed Saturday, but we can just pretend that it's Saturday.

assuming it's Saturday;

Today is Canada day, so what did I do? I had a Canada, or something like it, I went to a parade. For those of you who don't know a parade is a massive jumble of color loud noise and people throwing candy at you. For your enjoyment I will try, to the best of my ability, to describe this thing called a parade.
It started by the Rent-a-Junk store, and headed down 6th (I don't memorize the names, it hurts my head). Taking the lead I think was like a big fire truck with the mayor or maybe George Powell, somebody famous. After that things got more colorful with The Senior's Olympic Games Bus, there was this lady sitting next to me who yelled with pride that her grandma could take out all them after she said it an elderly man stepped off the float and wresled her to the ground then casually walked back to the float. After the violence was over we were given a real treat; a Marching Band, who apparently used for there float the same decorator who does most maximum security prisons. When you think about it though they are a marching band not marching interior decorators, this however brings me to the next part of the great parade The Marching Interior Decorators who were quite nicely dressed. Next came the proud, well you know, Club, who's bus driver could not shut up really she kept blowing the horn like she was a New Yorker in a traffic jam.
After most of the real floats had passed we were subjected to the "this town supports every group" floats, Nobody Cares About Us, Computer Novice Annoumous, Nobody Cares About Us Did Not Even Care About Us and all the other groups nobody cares about, most people walked on to catch up with the Seniours Olimpic Games Bus or fell asleep. After the parade, the bars filled like children in a mud puddle (they were a hot comoty), and I think everybody got Monday off because they are still sleeping it off. (It may be the sound of the marching band or the drinks).

Well all in all it was a truly great Canada Day. Now I set my eyes ahead to the American holiday called the 4th of July, I am celebrating all holidays this year in honor of each country's unique struggle, and I like to party. But you know what they say, after Canada and the 4th, don't forget Bastille Day!

Here we go again!

2006-06-27T22:54:00.000-07:00

Well it's 11 at night, exactly and I am sitting cramming for what was supposed to be a good blog entry, this is not the first time my mind has drawn a blank while looking at my computer screen. (My veteran readers will remember my "Cobras kill more people..." post.)

That's a funny expression "drawn a blank" because if you drew it, would it not be drawn on and thus NOT blank? That doesn't seem possible, but then again maybe we are all just actors in the movie of life and this planet is our Hollywood and things that aren't possible in 'real life' are always possible in Hollywood! But if this is not real live and just a movie, when is the end, when does the director yell cut at the end of the day and we go home? Maybe that's when we die, if so you would actually want long hours.

Not much

2006-06-24T17:16:00.000-07:00

My words of the wise tend to be long, so I am not doing one today becouse I feel sick, nextweek though.

Leopard Screen Shots!!!

2006-06-23T15:54:00.000-07:00

I just posted but I am so excited I had to post again.

If you are an Apple fan like myself you will be very happy to see these screen shots of Apples new version of their operateing system: OSX 10.5 Leopard, check em out here http://trinityrubicon.blogspot.com/2006/06/mac-os-x-105-leopard-screenshots.html

Chances are that they are faked nobody else has them that I know of but it still looks cool.

Things that annoy me...

2006-06-23T15:33:00.000-07:00

For today's blog entry I was going to write a list of 10 things that annoy me, but then I decided that it could be used against me. For example, I hate when people pronounce my last name Fan-tee-nah!* See, now if I ever meet anybody who reads this they will approach me "Hey, Travis Fan-tee-nah!" Then I would maul them and be sent to prison and I really don't want to go to prison. Speaking of which, that is another thing that annoys me, when I get sent to prison. This has never happened but if it did it would be annoying.

AHHH I just realized that I just told you two things that annoy me! This is exactly what I was talking about, I guess I could just hit backspace a bunch of times, but I am much to lazy to do that. So I guess I just have to run the risk of meeting somebody who reads this and having to listen to them say "Fan-tee-nah" then go to prison for mauling them.

*My last name is pronounced "Fan-te-na" the other way has WAY to much inphisis on the last to syllables.

The 6 Fingered man.

2006-06-22T11:55:00.000-07:00

DISCLAIMER: Before I post I would like to clarify one thing; people only have 4 fingers per hand the thumb is not considered a finger. Today, however, I will be pretending that the thumb is a finger, so in today's entry when I say I have 5 fingers per hand please don't email me and lecture me on fingers.

For some odd reason every now I count my fingers and toes, I do this to make sure that I do indeed have five, I just want to make sure. If I counted one day and found out that I had six I would go count somebody eles's and make sure they too have six.
Think about it, it would be a major break through if somebody just one day out of the blue found out "Oh the human race has six fingers per hand not five!" That person would be famous he would be on talk shows and do radio interviews! Then he would write a book "How I Discovered that People Have a Sixth Finger!" it would of cores be a runaway bestseller and they would become rich, and that is why I want to be that person.

Now If I found that I was one of the only humans on Earth to have six fingers I would most likely join Barnum and Bailey's and become a dancer which of course is completely unrelated to me having six fingers but I would still be rich and famous.

So I guess the real reason I count my fingers every few months is because I want to be rich and famous, no I am not trying to make a major scientific break through I just want riches beyond my tamest dreams and fame lots of it!

Slackers!

2006-06-21T12:20:00.000-07:00

Yeah, I know I have been slacking, it has been like 5 days since I last updated. But the good news is; I just found a song on iTunes that I have been looking for, looking for like the past 3 years!

Anyway I decided that today I would do something very extra special, but as I thought about it I could not think of anything so I decided to do nothing special for today's post.

Blah

2006-06-15T21:41:00.001-07:00

THIS JUST IN, TODAY I HAD A BLAH DAY, PLEASE STAY POSTED FOR FURTHER BULLITIONS...

The Ultimate Insider!

2006-06-14T17:17:00.000-07:00

To the untrained eye, there is no good reason why I call myself "The Ultimate Insider" but to me their is; I know that I am not actually a cool guy who bloggs, I am actually a cool guy who bloggs who can also do flips and run up walls I'm sort of a ninja spy. Ultimate refers to my ninja status and Insider refers to my Spy status. The Insider also refers to the fact that nobody really knows what I do, yet I am always seen at parties with ridiculously famous icons, and I am always seeing movies like a year before they come out and I know about all major news stores about a week before they are seen in the papers*. I don't know when it is that I am doing all this 'inside' stuff, but I like to think it's what I do when I am asleep.

*Your grandkids won't know what that is.

Save the net

2006-06-09T12:39:00.000-07:00

I don't like to get political, and I don't think of this blog as political in any way, but this is an issue that all parties are fighting for, and it's about net neutrality! Republicans Democrats everybody from all different parties is fighting for this. To find out more about keeping the internet safe from big telephone companies visit http://www.savetheinternet.com If you don't in a year this blog may no longer exist!

Hyped about RAM!

2006-06-09T11:39:00.000-07:00

I just put in 256 more MEGs of ram!!! So naturally I am very excited! It works like a charm! I guess that's all I really have to say for now, I may write something a bit longer a bit later!

Sliced bread

2006-06-07T18:25:00.000-07:00

People have are always saying "Oh that's the greatest thing sense sliced bread." This expression was invented because many years ago (the way people say it seams like it was the late 1800's), people were still baking bread in there bread machines, pulling it out and eating it like savages. Then one day one guy said "Hey lets use on of these," he held up a knife and ever sense people have been cutting, or slicing bread!

The expression "That's the greatest thing sense sliced bread" has been used by many people describing many things. In fact it has been used to describe so many things, there is no longer A greatest thing, but several of them! So I have, because I am board, decided to come up with my list of the 5 greatest things sense sliced bread.

1) Buttered bread.
2) The pencil.
3) The computer.
4) Myself.
5) The Blog.

There you have it, my list of the 5 greatest things sense sliced bread.

Math is absurd.

2006-06-06T16:02:00.000-07:00

This is a theory I came up with about seven or eight months ago: my theory states that Math is absurd. All math is: just some scraches on paper that people think about (lots). But think about it, if society told you ever sense you were a little baby, in desperate need of a change, that 1 + 1 = 5 it would be normal to you. Then if somebody came along and said that 1 + 1 + 2, you would laugh at them and then punch them. (When I tell people this theory that's what they do.)

Anyway I guess what I am trying to say about math and everything is, I most likely have dangerous amounts of time on my hands. This is not always a bad thing, the greatest theories were thought up by people with lots and lots of time on their hands but in my case, I'd say it's a dangerous thing. What credentials do I have to diagnose my self? I have two much time on my hands.

Another example of this problem: I kept writhing in my blog, long, long, long, after I had driven my point home.

Reintroducing the insider...

2006-06-05T16:25:00.000-07:00

Ok, so as most of you can tell I lost interest in Words of the Wise a long time ago (December), So I have decided to dedicate this blog to rants, odd news, they will of course be executed with the same humor everybody has come to expect from me. Now don't get me wrong I love writing columns so I will not be killing Words of the Wise, it will still come about two times a month, every Saturday, as usual but now I will be writing lots more during the week. You may be thinking, how will writing more want to make Travis increase how many Words of the Wise columns he writes a mount, the answer is: I am a psycho.

Ok so this new plan, of writing everyday is effective as of today! What you just read is what I will be writing for today, be shore to check up tomorrow for a new rant or some odd fact that you don't care about, but can use to impress people.

Words of the Wise (April 15); Why I am Lazy

2006-04-15T15:43:00.000-07:00

I have not written in almost a monuth, this would lead many people to think that I am a very Lazy person, this is true. But it is only one of the reasons, the other is that I keep forgetting (personally I like the lazy excuse better). So I am going to try to stop being so lazy, but this is hard because I don't even know if anybody reads this blog, if you do could you please comment?

Now if I was syndercated that would be different, I would have to meet the newspapers demands once a week every week 52 weeks a year! (Yes I know that is another excuse). But if I was syndercated I would most likely drop dead from the pressure, then I would not write any more, that would be a good way of getting out of a contract.

The best compromise is to have some old lady who used to teach 2 grade for about 90 years of her life give me a call and harangue me until I write my column. She would not actualy come to my house because then she might beat me with a ruler or something, but she would call! Every Saturday morning I would get a call from Mrs. Always Looked 100 Years Old, and she using her gravely voice and 2 grade teaching persuasion would get me to write something.

I don't have one of those and I am thankfull for it, comedy's I just have nothing to write about, like today and the day I published that one I think it was called "A Computer and an Empty Mind" or somthing like that. This type of thing is what comes out when I have nothing to say, it is just me, my computer, me, my computer, bad and boring things happen.

None of this of coarse has anything to do with why I am lazy, in fact I will most likely not even get around to talking about it.

Oh! Another way I could get around to doing this each week is to have some type of Rube Goldberg machine get me up and over to my computer, actually that's still hard for someone like me. Maybe the Rube Goldberg machine could just write "Words of the Wise each week for me! That would be great, so if anybody could make something like that I would pay you 15 bucks!

Anyway that will most likely never happen, the reason is that I don't have 15$. So I guess I will just keep sitt'en here, writing, nothing.

The Power of the Internet...

2006-03-18T21:44:00.000-08:00

The power of the internet, is a very, vary dangerous thing!

For instance I just made a new website for myself. Not nufichicken.com but http://travisfantina.tripod.com/ it is a free site unlike nufichicken.com meainig you have to hasle with dumb adds, but hey it's not like I'm paying for it. Anyway of corse I am rambleing so good night for now and enjoy the sites!

Words of the Wise (Mar 18); The Closet!

2006-03-17T23:11:00.000-08:00

Closets are one of the most dangerous places in the home, for many reasons. If you have a 'youngster' in the house, the greatest danger in his closet is; a harry monster (note that not all monsters are harry). If you are older you most likely have a vast amount of things in your closet, most of which you have not looked at sense 1981 when you sold your last house and piled all your junk in your new closet!

I just happen to be a closet expert, meaning for the next fifteen minents of your life you will have to here about what has worked for me. I have battled some of the most fiercest of closet monsters, and cleaned some of the dirtiest closets (and clocks for that matter), and now I am ready to give my vast nolage the world. I am doing this all free of charge, out of the goodness and kindness of my heart! (which is full of junk, that I have not looked at sense 1981!)

1) Closet monsters.

Closet monsters plague children everywhere, they creep out from the dark closet in the corner and just when the kid is not looking they, make a sound, then jump out and- then mom and dad come in and it is all over. The key thing to remind kids of is; monsters are not that different then us! True they may look different, and eat different stuff, but kids that monster is just as scared of you as you are of it! Yeah that's right, think about that for a bit!

"Mom! I'm scared that the kid will make a noise again!"

"Oh, I guarantee you that there is nothing in that bedroom!"

"But mom I here noises coming from the bedroom door!"

"I want you to take a deep breath and walk in to that bedroom, count to ten then come out again, I promise nothing will happen to you."

The little monster then proceeds to do what he is told, he then sees the kid the kid sees him they both go running off to mom and dad!

2) Hazards of a grown person's closet!

The main hazard of the closet is; being eaten by a pile of your old suites, yearbooks, photos, vacuum and a box of Life magazines.

"Oh, My goodness the vacuum has got my foot!!!...

...Hey this is the John Lennon issue!"

Yes it happens all the time, my only suggesting is; every six months rotate the junk in your closet and the junk under your bed. Haha, no there are better ways to fix this problem then running and moving junk around! The most obvious is; buy a new house! It does not have to be a big one just a little summer get away where you can keep your stuff!

3) The wardrobe (An imitation closet!)

Yes there are many wardrobes in the world poising as closets, in fact you may have one in your home! If you do don't panic, just pretend it is a closet and hope that none of your guests will notice! Wardrobes have a real nice feature, it is not known to most but if you walk far enough back in your wardrobe, you will come to a magical land where odd creatures bound around, and beavers talk to you.

Words of the Wise (Mar 13); Our Solar System

2006-03-13T11:58:00.000-08:00

Believe it or not, you are part of the solar system, our solar system, why? Because that's how it works.

Any way the Solar System is the last frontier, and unlike the Enterprise we have not explored space to it's fullest, but I have so I know all about everything that happens there. In light of the darkness of space I will be talking, this week, about our solar system.

Our Solar System is made up of about 10 planets, one star, a moon, open space, space junk, and yes politicians. I will be first touching on the Sun, now this is techicanaly impossible, because you would burn up jillions of miles before you even got close to the Sun. Any way the Sun is a big ball of fire that is way to hot to even roast marshmallows over, it also has something to do with the way plants grow.

Now for the planets, I will first be talking about the inner 4 planets, these planets are the ones that can support life and lawyers. These 4 planets are also very small in comparison to an object like Marlon Brando in his old age.

Now one of these planets is called Earth, (this is the one I do not live on) it has what is known as a 'Moon' pronounced 'Moon'. Until 1991 the Moon was thought to be only a paper moon, but in late October of 1991 DR. Van Gobermen PhD came up with the contravorsal theory that the moon was made up of Green cheese, and in 1998 Gobermen's theory was accepted as a Scientific Law!

Now for the outer planets, there are about 6 of these, Mars, Saturn, Uranus, Goofy, Pluto, and Mickey! These plants are made up of gas and mean people's hot air, nobody has ever gone to any of them for on reason, because nobody cares. So I will now be moving on to....

....Space junk pronounced 'Space Junk' space junk is mostly small rocks called asteroids (based on the popular arcade game), and parts of NASA ships, so there is realy no point in investigating Space Junk any further, because after all, it is just junk.

Part XXIV Exploring Space!

So how do we explore space? Well there is NASA, and RNASA (Russia's NASA) there are also several private space programs. There is also the little talked about ASP, Atlantis Space Program, which sadly, turned into a deep sea program when Atlantis sunk. I have also made my own space program, we believe in duck tapeing scuba parts to my body and bouncing my self into space via a trampoline. So far the TRAVIS I, TRAVIS II, TRAVIS III, TRAVIS IIV, TRAVIS IV, and TRAVIS V, have been painful failures.

So, eager young space cadets, thanks for reading and I will see you on Goofy!

Words of the Wise (Feb 18); Economic crisis over Subs!

2006-02-17T19:30:00.000-08:00

Before I proceed I would like to announce that the word for "a sandwich that is long and on a bun" is highly debated, some folks call them, "Submarine Sandwiches". Others who are to lazy to say "Submarine sandwiches" just say "Sub" or "Subs", if you come from Philly you say "Hogies". I have even herd them referred to as a "Superman Sandwich" this of course has nothing to do with the popular comic/cartoon "Superman" all use of the name "Superman" is Travis Fantina's views and do not necessarily blah blah blah.

Now that is over with I would like to regale everybody with my personal problems; It all began one day when I walked in to my local sub shop, the shop will remain nameless, but let me assure you it was not a "mom and pop sub shop" it was a huge chain and I can assure you that you have one in your town. Now I was pretty hungry and so when I came across this sub shop, I wanted something to eat. So I went in and said to the guy;

Me: "guy, gimmey a sub"

Guy: "what kind would you like?'

Me: "ham, lettuce, tomato, provolone, olive oil, vinegar, roost beef, Swiss , pickle, anchovies but go light on em, Mayo, beats, gravy, pepper, salt, mushrooms (Chinese), radishes, carrots, olives, more pickle, a small assortment of dried fruit, a cherry on top, and I would like it on toasted white bread."

Guy: "Could I have that again?"

Me: "You bet ham, lettuce, tomato, provolone, olive oil, vinegar, roost beef, Swiss , pickle, anchovies but go light on em, Mayo, beats, gravy, pepper, salt, mushrooms (Chinese), radishes, carrots, olives, more pickle, a small assortment of dried fruit, a cherry on top, and I would like it on toasted white bread."

Guy: "That's what I was afraid of, ok so let me see you want; ham, lettuce, tomato, provolone, olive oil, vinegar, roost beef, Swiss , pickle, anchovies but go light on em, Mayo, beans, gravy, pepper, salt, mushrooms (Chinese), radishes, carrots, olives, more pickle, a small assortment of dried fruit, a cherry on top, and I would like it on toasted white bread."

Me; "No no I want; ham, lettuce, tomato, provolone, olive oil, vinegar, roost beef, Swiss , pickle, anchovies but go light on em, Mayo, beats, gravy, pepper, salt, mushrooms (Chinese), radishes, carrots, olives, more pickle, a small assortment of dried fruit, a cherry on top, and I would like it on toasted white bread."

Guy: "Oh! I see, that will be a few moments sir anything else?"

Anyway I got my sub expecting it to be the sensation that it usually is, but when I bit into it, it was terable! I had never tasted a more putrid peace of mud in my life! You are most likely thinking "duh! That sub was born to be gross!" but I have had subs like this before and TRUST me they are great! One of the 6 food wonders of the world! (food wonders also include; Chouterzuoomainet the popular French deresrt, and Pizzur the Italian food that was not properly translated when it came to America.) So my point is I had a 10 lb sandwich on my hands and I was out 54 dollars and 73 cents, now I am afraid to buy anything because I feel like I might be ripped off again!

My point is don't shop at the big chains stick to the mom and pops! Also if you ever get around to it you really ought to try a ham, lettuce, tomato, provolone, olive oil, vinegar, roost beef, Swiss , pickle, anchovies but go light on em, Mayo, beats, gravy, pepper, salt, mushrooms (Chinese), radishes, carrots, olives, more pickle, a small assortment of dried fruit, a cherry on top, on toasted white bread sandwich. They are very delicious.

Me for Pres

2006-02-12T00:15:00.000-08:00

For those of you who could not take the time to go to my site and print out the image of my campain poster I am putting it on my blog!
(if you don't know what I am talking about read my words of the wise for the first week in febuary!)

Words of the Wise (Feb 11); House noise.

2006-02-10T16:03:00.000-08:00

So what is with these house noises? I was down stairs today and I almost lost my lunch I was so scared! I actually herd people walking around, in my house (this is not an auditory hallucination), yet when I went up stairs there was nobody to be seen.
The worst part about these said 'noises' is that they happen mostly right before I go to bed, and right after reading the complete works of MR. Steven King, (yes I read his complete works every night). So naturally my head is filled with childhood fears of clowns! And dead pets and high schoolers who burn down there gyms! It is very traumatic to have these noises combined with my thoughts!

So what are these noises? Where do they come from? What is there purpose? The answer? I have no clue. I am currently working on some crazy way of getting rid of them forever and ever (witch is a pretty long time). So far I have come up with a few ideas; one burn my house and live in a tent on my front lawn, the pros of this idea are that I could collect the insurance money from the house and go to Hawaii! The cons of burning down my house are that after I came back from Hawaii I would be arrested for some sort of arson! So that idea was thrown out, but I was able to come up with a couple more, the second idea; spending like 300,0p00 (the p is Greek for "a number so huge nobody knows what it is) on a huge home sound system, I would crank it so loud that I could only hear the music and not the noises! The cons of this idea is that the neighbors would have me arrested for disturbing the peace. The pros are that when the police tried to tell me "get into the car" I would not be able to here them. I came up with one last idea; move to Texas. The pros (or pro) would be that people would no longer mess with me because everybody knows you just don't mess with Texas! The con would be that my new house would still most likely make noise.

So after all that you are most likely wondering "why did he chose Texas?" Good question, I myself don't know, I think it was the first state that popped into my head. Also I think that A1 company gives discounts to Texas residents, I should look into that.

I have asked others about this noise and they said that it was my heating or imagination, but I am shore it is people walking around in my house! I am settled on that, there are people who walk around in my house, and nobody can make me change my mind. Since I can not change my mind I decided to kind of just redo the image that I get when I here the people walking around... Instead of a three headed mass murder who likes to eat peoples large intestine raw, I changed my image of who it is, I changed it to somebody I know. I now picture my elderly neighbor down the street walking around in my house; I think he lives in one of the boxes that was never unpacked.

Words of the Wise (Feb 4); Travis for Pres!

2006-02-10T15:25:00.000-08:00

Wow over a month since I last posted!

Any way, politics. Politics seems to be a pretty hot topic for most writers, and not wanting to be excluded, I decided to grab the bull by the tail and pull it while it was sleeping.
I will start off by making the controversial statement; Travis Fantina should be elected president of the United States. Ok I know that you are most likely thinking; but the election is not until 2008. Truer thoughts have never been thought, but I have found a loophole. All we have to do is Impeach the guy who is in office now, then the next one, and then whoever is next, so on and so fifth. Eventually they will have impeached all the people down to a guy who lives in northwest Canada, and then they just won't impeach me!

The Travis Fantina Policies;

If I really want to be elected I will need a way to sway people over to my side so I have come up with this cleaver speech;
I am Travis Fantina, I am going to be elected president, you will vote for me! What I am going to speak on in the next few minuets is how I plan to run this country.
I will start off by passing a bill; all those who exit the rest room with out washing there hands will be sentenced with up to 90 days in the county slammer (in some states this means the death penalty). This law excludes those who 'forgot' 'where in a rush' 'don't care' 'were being removed from the washroom by gun point'.
I will also pass a cell phone talkers bill, all those who talk on cell phones in a public place for hours on end will be testing my Mars relocation program (oxygen thinks are only for those are rich). Of course you yeah you reading this you are excluded.
I also plan to clean up our parks, bulldoze slums and build a huge apartment complex for all those with out shelter! I will make cars bullet proof; I will give all workers all year off! I will fly to the mooooooooooon!

--End Speech--

So I think I could easily take office I passed two bills that don't really do anything (but you don't know that) I also said all the other stuff that candies say before the election. So remember if you are cool you will go to http://www.nufichicken.com/elect.html and print out my election poster!

blahblahblahblahlalala...

2005-12-24T21:07:00.000-08:00

OK hello everybody I will get back to the weekley post after the holidays! But first and formost; Mery Christmas! Ok now good night!

words of the wise (dec 17); Travis Fantina, the real story!

2005-12-20T12:45:00.000-08:00

(sorry its late!)

Smith; Thank you for coming Mr. Fantina.
Travis; No problem at all, thank you!

Smith; OK to start out what have you been doing these past few weeks that has kept you from blogging?
Travis; Good question, I have been working hard on the Bob the Chicken Christmas cartoon “The Ice man” and the bad news is that it has been renamed to the Bob the Chicken Winter cartoon because it will not be out in time for Christmas, (There is still a chance but it is slim). Other then that I don’t know.

Smith; What inspired you to first start your blog?
Travis; Hmm, I don’t really know, I guess it was just something I had wanted to do.

Smith: Is it hard to come up with a topic each week?
Travis; it is hard to come up with a topic each week!

Smith; Why are people having trouble logging into the nufichicken message board?
Travis; I am working on it and I think I fixed it, sorry for the inconvenience.

Smith; If I was a magic lamp and you could have any 3 things you wanted, what would they be?
Travis; Well you know that rule about how you cannot wish for more wishes?
Smith: Yes.
Travis; I would wish for that rule to disappear, then I would wish for unlimited wishes, and then well just about anything I wanted.
Smith; Always finding the loopholes!

Smith; The new iBooks have been our for like 5 months, but you bought yours 6 months ago, are you mad?
Travis; YES!! GRRR!

Smith; speaking of computers what do you use to do the nufichicken films?
Travis; Flash for the animation stuff (Flash MX 2004), then iMovie for the Voices, Gradge Band for the music, and to upload it I use Net Finder.
Smith; and this is on the iBook?
Travis; Yep.

Smith; Do you plan to do any other web projects besides nufichicken?
Travis; Yes, I do my freelance stuff, and I am also planning (in my head) some other cartoon projects.

Smith; Nufichicken has a history, blobman_22 then friedpoo22 now the nufichicken dot COM, what do you foresee coming in the future?
Travis; Maybe some live action stuff, a few more games and cartoons, and who knows what else.

Smith; after this cartoon (Ice man) what do you plan to do?
Travis; Cut back! Like I plan a game or cartoon in July but no sooner!

Smith; well it has been a joy, thank you for coming!
Travis; thanks.

2005-12-10T20:36:00.000-08:00

First off, so sorry I am late on posting, this is a record the latest I have ever been!

I am not a poet but it seams like a good way to make a point so I have decided to let my heart bleed this week and write a poem of great struggle (a mouse named bill’s to be exact);

A Mouse Named Bill

A poem by Travis Fantina

Mouse,
A mouse named bill,
Bill the mouse died today,
The mouse had not written a will,
So lets take his stuff and run away!

Haha ok I am not going to submit you to that sort of thing, but the point I am trying to make is it is late, I have had a busy week, and so blah blah blah I’m sure you get the message I am trying to send;
1) I am brain dead
2) I cannot think of anything to write, so I am trying to fill (sometimes known as Phil) space.

But I’m not very good at filling space so I am writing this.

Ok I thought of a topic that is sure to be a Killer; Warning Labels on Mattresses! I mean there is some poor person out there sleeping on there floor, I’m sure they would love to have a mattress! But we have to throw our mattress out! Why? Good question, it may have to do with all the diseases in blood, AIDS, HIV, ect but how many people bleed on there mattresses, I’m sure it is as many as bleed on there towels and towels are legal to sell! Now I will say this, I would be a little grossed out to sleep on a used for 5 years mattress but that is just me, I don’t think you should make it illegal! I think if you want a used mattress, knock your self out!

Long Long week!

2005-12-06T17:13:00.000-08:00

This has been a very very long week! Like so long we might as well ride slugs around the world. But it has been stuk in slow mode! And the worst part about all this is.... It's not even half over! 8 more hours and it will be Wendsday, then 24 till thursday, and last but not least another 24 untill Friday, then 19 until Saturday!

I know most of you are thinking; it takes 24 hours to get to Saturday from Friday. Yes I know, but this is the reasion the week is going slow, I am in antisapation of Friday, and the reasion is I am going to test my Time-Jump-Nano-Insteller-Travler 5 (beta version). If I can do it I will be the first man on Earth to have a 19 hour day! I hope to work it down so you can have like five hour days and they would be 5-10 so you get off at 5 and start your day then at ten go to sleep wake up at five the next day knowing you have done a full 8 or 9 hour day! (The workers love me!)

In closeing I once again got board at my computer!

It's up!!!!!

2005-12-03T20:16:00.000-08:00

Well I finally got Graffiti up http://www.nufichicken.com/ridesmovie.html so sorry for the wait!

As I watched my film I realized why lots of creative people don't watch there movies, I hate mine. So far everybody else liked it, the others who helped liked it, Nerdy Pickle, Bob the Chicken, One guy gave it like 8/10 so it must have been real good oh yeah my mom gave it a 6, I think I don't like it because it's not all that I can dream up but there is something like the Glass Ceiling, and after that you can get no better we have not hit the glass ceiling with this one, but I think we hit a hanging light fixture.

My first personal post...

2005-12-03T19:04:00.000-08:00

This has to be the first post (other then the Words of the Wise!) sence like nov 10! Well I'm just reporting in to say... I saw Arsenic and Old Lace today, it was a good play! It was very funny and quite good, and of corse well written!

I put up a new animation yesterday but we are still having lots of problems with the sound file, so keep your fingers crossed and hope for the best!

Words of the wise (dec 3); Christmas stories!

2005-12-02T16:45:00.000-08:00

“Are you troubled by past holiday disasters? Do you have a funny (for the rest of us that is) Christmas story? If so please write in to us and we may publish your story.”

This appeared in some of my writings this time last year, I’d like to thank you all for your sad and tragic moments at your Christmas gatherings, I had a million laughs reading them all!

Well to tell the truth, I did not ask for you to write in last year, I was not even writing this weekly thing! (Yeah I was smarter then.) But this year I made up some funny Christmas stories that almost seem like they could have happened, and then I selected my favorites to create these fictional yet realistic writings. Well I think I have said all that needs to be said so lets cut to the big juicy finish!

Dear Travis,
I am writing in regards to your request that people send in there holiday stories, well here is one that happened to my family back in 1998. No get ready for this, note I did not make any of this up!

We have a tradition of cutting down a pine from the back woods every year, it was about three days from Christmas I had flown to my partents about two days before, we (my brother father and I) went out to cut down a tree, as we were out in the woods we came upon a wounded deer, so we picked it up and put it on our shoulders and began to trudge back to the house, why we did not just go back and get some supplies I do not know. We walked back and put the deer on the deck, and then we covered him with come blankets.
As my brother ran inside looking for some bandages for the deer (he is a vet), but he forgot to close the door, well that deer just bolted through that door, and right on to the laden table, 2 days of cooking filled with glass, deer hair, and carpet. This was not all the deer ran to the front of the house and out the front widow (it’s hoof’s were first so It was not hurt). At that moment some old friends arrive, the deer just through the window staggers toward there car, still going quite fast. Our friend swerves to avoid the deer and wham into the garage! Well all in all that Christmas cost about 6 thousand dollars!

From,

Names Withheld.

PS; we use a fake tree now.

Now if this did not make you laugh I recommend some sort of night school for the straight-faced. Or maybe you have an even funnier one (I really don’t care how much you make up) so send them to me by leaving a comment on this blog, or email me tfantina@gmail.com or travis@nufichicken.com, I will run comments all through December and most of January!

Words of the wise (nov 26); Winter is fun for everyone!

2005-11-26T00:00:00.000-08:00

Throughout the years thousands of people have died because of winter, this is not good (last week I ‘hinted’ at the fact that if millions of people died it would be a good thing, but I was drunk on water). So this week I have decided to instruct you in the ways of winter fun, how to stay safe and have a good time, if you live in Canada or the South Pole most likely you have already been killed by some sort of snow storm. But for the rest of the people in the world who have not had the full force of winter yet here are some handy tips for you.

Part one; Reasons why I like the cold. No matter how cold it gets you can always go up to the attic and take out your great grandpa’s mothball, mildewed jacket. But when it gets really, really hot you can’t just strip off another layer, after you’re under garments there’s really nothing left. One time it was like 39c (102f) and I was so hot, so I just stripped off my skin that was a nightmare I wish I could forget. So layers are key no matter how cold it gets, just put on a few more mitts an you’ll be fine! This brings me to my next segment on our tour of winter fun!

Part two; Clothes make the (edited for politically correctness) person! You cant get all dressed up in your swim suit and go out side in freezing weather, for two reasons one, you could die. And two, you would be very disappointed that there was nothing to swim in. When dressing for the winter outdoors you should dress in layers, here’s how it works. Your first layer should be like a turtleneck, made or polyester, that’s right polyester! I’m sorry all you organic people who dress in all natural furs, but polyester is the way to go. You see polyester actually wicks the sweat away from your body, so your sweat does not freeze on your skin. Wool just keeps it there, this is fine for when you are working hard but when you stop you turn to ice. For your next layer you can put on wool, that’s ok, if wool is too itchy for you put on some sort of sweat shirt, maybe cotton, but cotton is not that good at removing sweat either, so never use it as a first layer! Now that you’re sort of warm put on something that will break the wind, a nice winter jacket would work, or if it’s a warmer day just where a windbreaker. If you don’t believe what I have said try going out in only a wool shirt and cotton short and running as fast as you can into a snow bank.

Part three; sledding a good way to make money. In today’s sue happy world everybody is trying to get rich, jump into the canned food shelf at the grocery store you can try to sue, going by the story that the bag (edited for politically correctness) person, pushed you into it. These stories only work some of the time, the sure fire way to make money is to do one of America’s ole time, and still a favorite pass times! A great winter one is sledding; Sledding is every boys dream, the thrill of speed, a race to the bottom, that’s why Flex’en Flyer makes top quality products for the American Family. That popular add, hit radios in the fifty’s! To get hurt sledding all you have to do is go to the top of a hill (on some one else’s property) go as fast as you can into their fence! This is a sure fire way to make millions! But if you just want to sled for fun I can recommend some nice computer games for you to play over the next few months!

Well I hope you have learned something here, it took me about twenty minuets to write this (including the time I ate a three course meal), so as you can see I really care. Oh if you get hurt using my advice sue your clothing manufacturer or your sled company, but don’t sue me!

Words of the wise (nov 19); A computer and an empty brain.

2005-11-18T18:28:00.000-08:00

Cobras Kill more people per year in India then lightning in the Vatican Republic. This has nothing to do with today’s topic, except the fact I have no topic, that’s right nadda nothing no nothing at all.

I woke up on Monday and said to my self “today I am going to write the best column ever!” So I went out and about my day, I did the same on Tuesday, and Wednesday, Thursday, and now here it is Friday and my document is blank (except for the last two paragraphs).

This really got me to thinking; if I can think of nothing to write, why not write about that? Well why not indeed, my motive; I have nothing to write about! My method; a computer and an empty brain. My Logic; Ha-ha ha ooh ha-ha ha, in reality I think I may be bordering on insanity (I have not slept in the past week and the only thing I eat these days is cat food).
Lets go over my reasons for writing this in detail. My motive; I have nothing to write about! We can break this down logically, Fact, I write a column every week. Fact this week of all weeks I have nothing to write about. This important information we can proceed to the next part of my logic.

My Method; A computer and an empty brain, these two tools combined can be very dangerous, as this editorial is proving. A computer has power to connect with millions, to create great masterpieces, to listen and view great masterpieces and a few other things I don’t feel like listing. Computers can also kill; yes even as you read this, your computer is killing you. How? well computers give off radiation, just like microwaves (that’s how they cook you TV dinners) so every time you look at your computer its like sticking you head in a microwave! Computers are also just as dangerous as open mines. That’s why I own birds, and every time I go to check my email I bring the bird with me, that way if I mutate the bird can get away.

I am quite aware that I am off topic, but that is ok because you and I know perfectly well we don’t have the attention span to listen to why I am writing this, yeah that’s what I was talking about!

It is not a good thing that the world’s attention span is getting less and- Ohh! Tater Tots! I love these things, they are like shredded potatoes molded into little logs! And they are so good I could eat 5 score of these things and not have enough!
Back to my second or third topic, an empty brain and a computer are a very, very dangerous combo! That’s why each day I hope that me along with the millions of people with empty brains will be killed by the radiation from there computers, then they will fall forward hitting the off button. This would eliminate the empty brain and the computer, and we would once again be normal aside from the fact that millions of people would be dead.

Now for the grand finally, I will go back to my original topic of how cobras killed more people in India then lightning killed in the Vatican Republic this is based on real fact (I saw it on TV). This is a surprising statistic because there are like 500 million people in India and like 4 or 5 in the Vatican Republic (Pope Benedict, his cat, and I few guards). Oh wait maybe that’s not so surprising, ok never mind this whole column is moot.

I’m gonna go cry about that, next week!

Today...

2005-11-15T18:37:00.000-08:00

Today was a good day, we at www.nufichicken.com filmed some more for our upcomming film "Graffiti" (Not American but Graffiti none the less). That's prity mich it, yesterday I kicked back and had a lazy monday, sence it was a holiday weekend, but today it was back to the salt mine.

What's so bad about salt mines? Any body reading this please leave a comment or email me travis@nufichicken.com

When work starts on a tuesday the week never seems as long to most people, but for me it will becouse for some sick reasion my Thrusdays always feel like Fridays! Just you think about that! (don't just email me the answer of the salt mine question.)

Board board board

2005-11-12T14:18:00.000-08:00

Toaday I got up at about 20 after the hour of 9, I ate some bacon, eggs and toast. Then I went for a walk with some others, we hiked for about 20 min and then we got to the top of the mountain, we trained with sowards for about 30 min then came back down.

Now I am board, very board. I played NFS unederground (Need For Speed) for like 2 hours when I got home, but now Im tiard. I am listning to Hotel California.

This post is jumpie and poorly written and misspelled, so it must end now!

Ninja Update

2005-11-11T14:25:00.000-08:00

Yes for all those who were wondering I am still training to be a ninja, I have let up on my diet, but the push ups and crunches ect ect are still doing good. I started training with sowards last night, so I will be going into the snowie mountains tomarow at ten to train with sowards. (I know I spelled that worng but I don't have the energy to go back and correct eather of em so it will stay as it is.) Well
"Sweet Child of MIne" by Guns N Roses just started wich means nothing, but if feel like getting up now.

Good by.

Words of the wise (nov 12); And they walked among the cattle.

2005-11-10T21:12:00.000-08:00

Cows lead very simple lives they eat, sleep, herd out to graze (also involves eating), herded back to be milked, herded around for exercise. Then herded back into a big box filled with little boxes called stalls. After doing this for 4+ years they are herded in a different direction and never seen again in cow form (of curse later we know they are reincarnated as burgers and such). A pretty boring live leading to a steak or shoes, would you want that? We as people would never let ourselves be herded by cowboys, or stuffed in to little pens or killed by a thoughtless foe… But what about machines?

Lets take a day-in-the-life approach to this problem, and now Travis Fantina presents, “A day in the life of a human!” At about 6:30 maybe 7 we awake to the sound of a hum, we shut the alarm off and promptly go back to sleep. After 15 minuets the alarm rings again, we know if we do not get up this time it (the alarm) will poke us with a mettle rod sending us a painful shock. So we get up, and go out to the kitchen and graze on some food. Then we walk out our door and into a stall known by most as an “elevator”. After leaving the elevator we come out into the open to mingle with the herd, we follow the herd being herded by stop signs, traffic lights, and cars. We get to the office take another elevator up yet again, another pen also called a cube or office. We slave away doing nothing but what we are programmed to do. (Sit around looking at a computer, every now and then getting some food, and making frequent mooing and grunting “Mmm thanks for your project” “yep na poblem”). At the end of the day we go back to the barn the same way we came out, and repeat the process again and again.
Keep in mind “A day in the life of a human” is just a generalization; some readers may live in houses, or may be construction workers, or car salesmen (politely correct: sales people).

Thank goodness we don’t are not treated like that, wait, what am I doing here? Why am I looking at this computer? Why am I sitting in this box*, oh no this is offal! Moby we are more like cows and sheep then we think, but being a cow is not as bad as it may scream! If your lucky you can cross a political border, or quit a job and find the greener grass, or maybe you can be a cow on a dairy farm and never be killed for beef.

I conclude this little article, now I go on my quest for the greener grass. Thank you reading and I will talk to you next week!

*I work at home but my room is a white box.

Why the lack of posts?

2005-11-09T18:37:00.000-08:00

If you are wondering about the lack of posts in the past week or so, it is becouse I have had nothing to say. I still have nothing to say but I don't want to be one of those wimpy posters who posts em one liners, so I will try to think of some things of value to post. Well I can not think of anything, so that will conclude this post.

PS. I did not run this through spell checker thinger so if you cant read it it's not you falt!

Words of the wise (nov 5); Put up the tree, then the eggs.

2005-11-03T17:38:00.000-08:00

I woke up bloated with candy, legs hurting from walking, well actually I did not go tricker treating, I went to a trunker treat, and handed out candy to kids. Any way I woke up with one thought in my mind; Halloween is over that means all the stores are getting ready for Christmas. I walked downstairs and turned on the TV, the 2006 cars were going from 21,000 and up, it was like some sick joke played on me. Everything was going faster then it should have been going! I was sucked into the world of tacky slave made goods, and over hyped Christmas gifts!
This is a good question 2006 cars, why 2005? Is this having anything to do with the fact that in the womb babies have sprits but are still not born yet? Is it like car companies giving birth in 2006 only pregnant in 2005? This happens with more then cars, June 10th school is out, so we need to print pictures of school busses on our tissue boxes.
“Ok it’s the Monday after Easter, everybody you know what this means. Mandy, you forgot to string the bats! Joe more costumes in the windows!”
“Can we not have one day, just one of rest after Easter?”
“No somebody may want to buy Halloween candy six months before the holiday!”
I am the kind of person who these pre, pre, hyped things are wasted on, infect the day after Halloween, Christmas, Easter, I go running up and down the discount isles buying everything at half price so I will have it for next year. I think this is the opposite of what they want to accomplish, but I love it. Those are my shopping days, get it quick, get it cheep, and get out! The stores hate me, but I give them money and they can not complain about that.
I miss the days when we had holidays, lots of them. New Years, Valentines Day, Easter, my birthday, Canada Day or 4th of July, Labor day, Thanks Giving (Canada) Halloween, Reemergence Day or Veterans Day, Thanks Giving (US), Christmas and New Years Eve. These are just a small few; there are holidays for every day of the year! I did not even begin to talk about Hanukah, Passover, Kwanza, and all the others! Out of the 14 or so machined only 3 or 4 maybe 5 have made commercial success. Ok maybe people have “Special Sales” or something but only some have gotten real big!
Ok so I ranted about holidays and cars, but what about season change? Did every company just forget that school starts in September? I mean I don’t even like school busses, even when I was in school I never rode them when I could avoid it. And this is just the beginning, any thing that can be hyped will be hyped, and almost anything can. Just like the super bowl is hyped about for about 2 months before and after the event, someday marbles will be two. Televised poker, yeah that will sell a lot of chips and dips!
I would like it if major events happened about every 4 months and they stayed for 1-2 weeks, not the duration or the full 4 months! You can get in evolved write you congress person lobbying them to change the laws of commercialization of holidays, keep in mind they are more likely to answer if you include your bank number or credit card.

My activity leavle is soring!!!

2005-11-03T17:36:00.000-08:00

I went for a little run in the snow today, I put on a warm hat, gloves, jeans, tee shirt and windbreaker. I knew if I had a jacket it would restrict my running ability so I left it out. It's about -10c but I was kept warm by the run. I ran up and down hills in the snow and did it for about 10 minuets.
Then I came home and did a few crunches and a couple pushups.

I am going to post my colium for Saturday even thought it is a bit early, but you can read it.

Just real quick...

2005-11-02T16:29:00.000-08:00

I had a good day today, A good day was it today, today was ok but not great, what they call good. That said I will now say that even though I have one collem a week (Saturdays) I may sometimes post my collium on tues wed or even thur, sometimes I may also do 2 in one week :0 (Shocked face) but if I have something to say (those who know me know that I do), then I will say it! That said I will now go away.

Words of the wise (oct 29); The World Turns Fast.

2005-11-01T22:32:00.000-08:00

I used to have a tape, it was not even mine, but I had it (I think I optioned it thought less then illegal means). But that doesn’t matter much now, what matters is what I’m about to say; that is the speed at witch the world turns.
For my birthday I got a CD/tape/radio jam box or what ever it’s called, I also got a CD I put my tape in and listened to it, then I put my shiny new disc in and listened to that.
A few years later I got enough money from pay phones and vending machines to buy another CD I also liked it, after that I went into a CD buying frenzy I think I bought 3 in one year! Then I realized that I had over ten discs, I needed some way of lugging them all around, so like many other crazed consumers I did the sensible thing to do… Wait until Christmas and have Santa give me one. In this case I got a nice black and grey CD case holding a total of 32 discs! I put all my CD’s in it, but then I realized that I did not have the enough to fill it up, so I made back ups of all my music, then back ups of the backups, and then I made mixes of all my CDs.
My CD case was full at last, and I was happy until I got an iPod. Then I found out that all my backups and mixed CDs were good for only two things and they were transferring them to my iPod, and then selling them so I could buy more songs on iTunes.
Where did all this getting rid of my CDs leave my CD case that Santa gave me? Well it sat in the back of my drawer for a few weeks until I discovered a new technology; the DVD! So by this time I had collected about 40 digital video discs, how the heck was I going to take this massive collection to my friends house, so I loaded all my DVDs into my CD case grabbed my iPod, I was off to my friends house for 10,000 hours 41 minuets and 32 seconds of meada.
This is where I am now, but I know as well as you do that soon they will invent an MP3 DVD player and then I will not need my DVDs any more. I have prepared a plan for when this happens I will sell my DVDs to a history museum for lots of money.
This has all happened very fast, so fast that I’m sure that some people still have family air looms called records, I’m not sure any body knows what a record dose but I do know that Paleontologists just discovered a record about 3 feet below where they found Lucy, any way my point is to stay up to date on our fast moving world you have to be rich and fast so you can buy stuff the minute it comes out, because you know by the time Amazon ships it to you it will be outdated.

About me.

2005-11-01T22:12:00.000-08:00

Hello my name is Travis... yadda yadda, I am a columnist; I make fun of emerging trends, famous people, and that sort of thing. I will post my writings on this blog, for more of my antics please go to www.nufichicken.com it is a collection of Flash animations that I have made, th-th-thats all folks!